Praise Revolution: Suffer

I have just read my devotional and loved today's thought.
It is nothing new that I haven't heard before, it is not a huge revelation for most, but for me it was particularly heartening and thought provoking.

Verse:
'Do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering' - 1 Peter 4:12

It says::
"A fundamental truth of the getting-to-know-God process is that some aspects of Him can only be revealed in pain....
One thing we will eventually learn is this; God shows up in our suffering in ways that He otherwise would not. Doesn't it make sense that if we are to know the mercy of God, we are going to have to come face-to-face with our sin first? Or that if we are going to know God as our Healer, there must first be some sickness? Or that if He is to be our Rescuer, we must first be in some sort of trouble from which we need rescuing? Or that if we are to understand His compassionate comfort, we must have some kind of hardship that makes His comfort understandable?"
- Worship the King Devotional - Chris Tiegreen.

I like it. And I wonder how many times have I been in pain or in a trial and become too self absorbed that I missed out on seeing another aspect of God working in my life. That I missed out on God rescuing me because I was curled up in a ball and wouldn't let anyone in, even God.

I hope in future trials I will watch for His work and be encouraged knowing that God is still with me and is acting when I can't.

Oh Us..

Christina's freckles on her nose that suit her perfectly and make me smile.
Alana's red hair that no-one else could pull off quite as well.
Jenny's smile that brightens the greyest of days.
How I just love them.

Books.

Now that school is [almost!] officially over I am going to restart reading books that interest me rather than the textbooks that are incredibly boring and marginally informative.

I found Blue Like Jazz after seeing several notible Christian people recommend it. Where I first heard of it I can't remember but have known of it for some time. After I found it mentioned in the To Write Love on Her Arms story, and then also as one of Brooke Fraser's favourite books I went in search of it.

So now, when I need new material I am going to return to Brooke Fraser's list and take note. I know some of these books or have heard of the authors before and know they're good. And plus it's Brooke Fraser so it'd have to be quality writing to make the favourites.
“Emergency Sex and Other Desperate Measures” – Kenneth Cain, Heidi Postlewait, Andrew Thomson
“Same Kind of Different As Me” – Ron Hall & Denver Moore
“The Ragamuffin Gospel” – Brennan Manning
“The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time” – Mark Haddon [READ]
“We Wish to Inform You that Tomorrow We Will Be Killed With Out Families” – Philip Gourevitch
“Letters and Papers from Prison” – Dietrich Bonhoeffer
“The Great Divorce” – C.S. Lewis
“The Pursuit of God” – A.W. Tozer
"Blue Like Jazz" – Donald Miller [READ]

I want to get a hold of all of CS Lewis's work at some point. He is brilliant.
I miss reading solely for pleasure. Must make sure I do it more often.

the congo

Do you guys know what's happening in the Democratic Republic of Congo?
I knew, I had heard vaguely but I was watching the news tonight and got a glimpse of just how bad it has gotten.

The people live in refugee camps that are patrolled by the rebels.
I heard how one 15 year old girl went to get firewood with her friends and was raped by a soldier.
It went on to say that even though alot of the camps supply wood and such so they don't have to go out, the women and children are still not safe, their are rapings in the camps because the rebels are the ones holding the guns.
This totally cut me.

I researched a little bit about this war and found that it has been going on since 1998.
It cut me that the world is only just starting to notice, that we are only just starting to care.
This is the worlds deadliest conflict since World War II.
It has killed 5.4 million people so far.
The prevalence and intensity of rape and sexual violence is the worst in the world.
The UN, Rwanda, Uganda have all been involved in this time to try and bring peace to the country. There were peace treaties but they failed.

I don't know. Maybe this is why I feel like I'm running out of time. That things like this are happening all around the world and us in our luxury look the other way and forget.
When I think about all those people I dying can just see God crying for the lost; that they never had a chance to know Him. My heart starts to break.

God works in surprising ways. For awhile last year I steadily prayed for God to give me a heart for the people. For His people. Slowly it is happening a year later. Slowly God is starting to put people other than myself in my heart. I still have so far to go. I am still a self-centered human. But now my heart breaks for God's children; my prayers are turning from my needs, to the needs of others

And in all this I am realising that a path for one is not the path for all.
That God has a plan and I'm starting to understand it a little more.
He knows what will most fulfil me most.

Hebrews 12:1
Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses,
let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles,

and let us run with perseverence the race marked out for us.

ringlets

I have a ringlet.
I put my hair in a side pony-tail and much to my delight and surprise it turned into one big ringlet.
I hope it does it again sometime.

pointless

Calculus is done and doesn't it feel good to put the books in a pile in the corner and never have to open them again.
Yes yes yes. Can't wait until there is nothing left on my desk.

My cousin is getting married on Saturday.
=]
But I can't be there
=[
Dad is going over on Thursday to 'represent' us it's just dumb not being there since she is the first cousin to get married and I love her to pieces.
I miss the whole rest of the family. My best Christmas's have been spent over there.
Maybe for a good excuse for a few weeks holiday in summer 09.

Away off in the distance I can see a plane as a white speck in the sky and I can't help but think that will be me in exactly 18 days.
In fact, it 18 days I will have been sitting in the plane for half an hour.

On a side note. I miss my friends. Exams have made me lonely.
Thanks for coming over and giving me an affectionate headbutt Alana, you made my day.




And so now to Shakespeare, Austen, Campion and unfamiliar.
urgh.
Procrastination is definately on the up&up.

new addition.

Meet Jetta...

She's cuter than you are!
=]

opportunity && learning.

It's not until the opportunity has passed that you realise you should have taken it.

In the past two days I have had two conversation's with girls who I never would have expected to talk to, girls who I automatically assumed would look down on me/not like me/be 'too cool' to talk to me or judge me.
But instead both were lovely, genuinely interested in what I was doing next year, keen to chat about the years that we've spent here and how history is possibly the worlds most boring subject.
When talking to these girls I began realising that maybe everyone is not looking at me like that and perhaps I have missed out on meeting some lovely people because I was too worried about what they would think, too afraid to put myself out there.

I have had five years to learn this and it's with only 1 day to go that I actually do. Dumb.
I feel like I have missed a great opportunity.
But on the other hand at least I've learnt it before next year.

facebook & running.

Now is the hard part.
The time where I start getting e-mails saying 'this person sent you a message' or 'this person left you a comment' and I want to go on facebook and check just incase it's important.
It's not. I know that but just that fact that I can't go on it makes it seem so.

Bebo's fine. Myspace is fine. But facebook is where it's apparantly happening and I'm not there.
I am not going to fade and this is doing me a world of good. I'll last until the 28th.


But on the other hand I have discovered that running is not enjoyable because it's a time to think, but it's enjoyable because all you have to concentrate on is putting one foot in front of the other and all the other clutter disappears from your mind. All the troubles, worries, stresses and problems just go and don't return until the endorphins fade off.

Maybe it's just because I can't run and think at the same time.
Takes too much brain power that I do not have.

Speaking of brainpower I have just done an hour of differentiation. Urgh.
I am heading back to do another hour because in the coming exams, anything less than merit is not good enough.


4 days until Prizegiving & Grad Dinner
8 days until first exam. [heck no!]
19 days until last exams [heck yes!]
27 days until Christina's Engagement Party & flying out till America.
PSYCH!

fireworks

I
go
to
America
in
less
than
a
month.
joyjoyjoy.

it just gets more and
more exciting every day.



i'm going to see fireworks tonight with my friends =] yay for a reason not to stay home && yay for friends.

time

I am beginning to realise the precious value of time.
Recently I have been praying for God teach me not to be lazy, or wasteful or sloppy.
I have found him to be immeasureably answering my prayer.

I was shocking before. Spending all of my time on a computer, reading a book, watching a movie.
Now I am running almost daily. I come home from school and go straight out for a run. I come home with a quick break for something to eat and get changed/shower and then study with a break for dinner and family time. That is changed on different nights but mostly it is what I would like to be doing.
I am still struggling to push myself fully to utilise all my time, I find myself slipping and have to catch myself.
But God is faithful and He is still working. I am still growing under His gentle guidance.

Thank-you Lord for Your faithfulness. Thank-you for your patience in teaching me how to push myself, to ignore what my flesh says and keep going. I would not be able to achieve it without You.

wisdom.

'So where does this leave the philosophers, the scholars, and the world's brilliant debaters? God has made the wisdom of this world look foolish. Since God in his wisdom saw to it that the world would never know him through human wisdom, he has used our foolish preaching to save those who believe' - 1 Corinthians 2:20-21

I like this.
I like knowing that no amount of science will ever be able to 'prove' the existance of God. That all of our wisdom will never be able to 'prove' God is there.
I like that God will always be a feel. God will never be a fact of our life until we have felt Him.
I like it that there is no way God will be a fact before a feel.
No matter how much you try, if you have never experienced the feel of God, you will never know the fact of God.

No matter how much you know or how many scriptures you remember, no matter whether you've studied the bible indepth or how 'learned' you are, if you don't have the feel of God, if you don't have the relationship all of the fact is worthless.
I don't think fact will lead you to God.
You need the feel of God to really believe in Him and therefore turn Him into fact.
But fact will not turn into feel, most of the time anyway.
Now I think about it, it probably could but lets not go there. It ruins the impact of everything above.

"This foolish plan of God is wiser than the wisest of human plans, and God's weakness is stronger than the strongest of human strengths" - 1 Corinthians 2:25

I like this as well. It reminds me off how great God is, of His might and power.




I'm off to do more chemistry study.
PSYCH!